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THE
SCARIEST PICTURE YOU'LL SEE
TODAY...
Dear Lord. I think it's
fair to say that there's a little more than
Beta-carotene flowin' through Carrot Top's
bloodstream here. Just saying. Poor guy looks like
someone injected massive amounts of HGH into that
fucking chick from Wendy's. And holy shit, those
gotta be the scariest soup bones (mmm, Carrot
Soup) I've ever seen in my life. At this point,
Carrot could probably produce full-size S.U.V.'s
from his trunk o' hilarity and then proceed to
physically launch them into the atmosphere when
he's done his act. You know, right before he
juggled God on stage. Just because he can.
Now, normally, I'd blame my favorite comic
book stand-by, the dreaded GAMMA RAYS (which by
the way only give you superhuman abilities and not
cancer. Trust me) for Carrot Top's rapid
super-human growth spurt, but I think that perhaps
something else is afoot here. (although, his
father WAS a SCIENTIST
FOR
NASA. So it IS possible.).
That said,
the more I look at Carrot, the more I'm reminded
of someone else. WAIT A SECOND. It couldn't be.
COULD IT?
....
...
...
...
...
THUNDER.
THUNDER.
THUNDER.
THUNDERCATS!
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Tell me I'm wrong.
Oh my god. It's uncanny. And completely
terrifying. I wonder if there's a sword that can
grant me the complete opposite of 'Sight beyond
sight'? It might come in handy right now to burn
the images from my mind's eye that'll likely haunt
me forever. But hey, hats (unruly bushy red
manes?) off to Carrot here anyway for pulling it
off. Having a huge broad sword capable of giving
you sight beyond your wildest imagination (and not
just to see all the people in the back rows not
laughing) just might come in handy for the first
heckler stupid enough to try and disrupt his set.
Well, so long as that heckler isn't a giant
grayish blue muscle-bound
Mummy, with a strange
quasi-SCOTTISH ACCENT (and not Egyptian. Because
Lord knows Scotland was known for their
Mummification). Because if that's the case, he's
fucked. Good luck stopping the 4 Ancient Spirits
of Evil armed only with a trunk full of pants with
ball scoops sewn into the crotch. It's an uphill
battle. No doubt. Normally, I'd say he'd have the
other Thundercats to back him up, but I'm pretty
sure Cheetara just used her short-term speed burst
to get the fuck out of dodge after seeing that
opening picture. Clearly, we should have followed
her example.
SNARF. | | |  |
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