Welcome To The Vault! In This
Edition, Sean Carless Goes Back To Yesteryear To
Bring Us WWF's Macho
Madness!

MADNESS
Approx running
time: 2 hrs
Approx time
period covered:
1987-1988
Released:
1988
Host:
Mean Gene Okerlund, Randy Savage &
Elizabeth;
After the recent force feeding of the shit of many
colors today's WWE has been gagging me with the past couple of
years, I decided to go back to a time when I was but a simple
mark who had no concept of terms like "workrate" and "jobbing"
and just watched the show through the eyes of a child.
Unfortunately, my mother made me give those eyes back to their
original owner, and no formal charges were filed. Lucky
me.
Anyway,
I almost pulled “Hulkamania” out of the box first, but had
second thoughts. I ultimately decided I was in no mood to
celebrate the homoerotic antics of Gene Okerlund and Hulk
Hogan, who was decked out in a pair of tiny shorts that should
have died with disco. And as much as I longed to spend two
hours watching the Hulkster and Gene drink egg-yolk cocktails
and grease each other up with baby oil, I decided to pass.
Imagine that.
That said, for my first Vault review in a
long time, I thought I'd spotlight Randy "Macho Man" Savage
since he returns to PPV for the first time in over 5
years for TNA tomorrow night. And to honor The Macho Man, I
decided to choose the 1988 release of “Macho Madness” from the
fledgling coliseum video line, to which I think the WWF still
has Hillbilly Jim on the road peddling….
This was an interesting time in the WWF, as Hulk
Hogan after about 5 years of the same shtick, (you know, take
a shit kicking, no sell his opponents finish, then vanquish
them with the dreaded bodyslam/big boot/legdrop hat-trick of
low impact mega-offense) decided to take his swollen, shiny
noggin to the hills of Hollywood where he hoped to segue his
immense mainstream appeal into big budget movies. But sadly,
the World just wasn’t ready for deep and
meaningful cinema like "No Holds Barred" and
“Suburban Commando”. That, and the fact that the Hulkster
possessed an acting ability that made Tori Spelling seem like
Laurence fucking Olivier in comparison. Still, to this
day, I cannot figure out why I believed Hulk Hogan when he told me
he could carry us all to safety from a natural disaster by
clinging to his "barn door back", yet he could not
convince me that he was an intergalactic bounty hunter....
Anyway, the company needed a savior while the
Yellow & Red was on its hiatus, and that man was Randy
Savage, whose popularity was just one of those things
that just exploded completely out of left field. Savage was
the first man in the WWF to blur the lines between “good” and
“bad” in the then milk and cookies era of the WWF, and coupled
with his athleticism, he made the WWF Title picture
change drastically at the time (or at least until Orange Juice
returned for his vanity belt the following April,
Bruther).
The
irony is though that Randy almost never got the
opportunity to wear the belt. It would take a
political power-struggle backstage with Honky Tonk
Man for Vince to change his original booking plans. (an
event today that'd take hypnosis, a kidnapping and a time-bomb
strapped to Linda to pull off).
You
see, Honky used his leverage as Champion to veto a Title
change to Macho on the February 1988 Main Event broadcast,
as his contract was about to expire, and he threatened to
leave the company with the belt if the match went on as
is. And as a consolation, it's said Randy got the big one
at Mania instead, rather than Ted DiBiase as was the original
plan. So, ya, you could say that Honky fucking Vince in the
ass was the best thing that could have ever happened to Macho.
And Macho returned that favor years later by doing it
to Steph! Oh yeah. Dig it (in there, real
deep). Actually, I have no idea if thus urban legend is
even true, but there has to be some reason why Macho is
black-listed from WWE, and that has always been a pretty
fucking good reason. (Macho) Man, you'd think that
after marrying a dude whose previous relationship was with a
woman who has a bigger penis than I do, that Ol' Steph would
adopt a 'don't ask don't tell policy" about former lovers. Oh
well.
Anyway,
the following video was put together sometime in the fall of
1988 during the height of Randy Savage's Title reign. Right as
Hulk Hogan's big orange head reappeared on WWF TV, only to
be brutally beaten by The Big Bossman, that for a
staunch racist southern Prison Guard, sure didn't mind
taking orders from a Pimp.
Aptly titled "Macho Madness", the
video began from Savage's much ballyhooed face turn
during the October 1987 Saturday Night’s Main Event broadcast.
(However the WWF never showed the setup for this feud that
started with Honky Tonk Man referring to himself on WWF
Superstars as the greatest I-C champ ever, infuriating the
still *officially* heel Macho Man, as he was regarded at the
time as possibly the "greatest" due to a one year reign that
ended just several months before this segment.).
Randy Savage Vs. Honky Tonk Man; (09/23/87)
Joined in progress, this one shows the last two minutes
of a match that to this day is still a mark-out moment for me
as a fan. Savage absolutely dominates Honky, and HTM keeps
narrowly escaping defeat (an act that drew HTM and WWF a
shitload of revenue). Honky eventually goes for the Shake
Rattle & Roll neckbreaker (his finisher, and a
completely "all show" hold that was perfected by Honky while
guys like Scotty 2 Hotty were still jerking off their, umm,
worms to their Dad's Hustler in the bathroom.).
Anyway, Savage back-body drops
Honky out of it and bodyslams HTM to the mat and runs to the
top and crushes him with the flying elbow. However, before
Savage can bag the belt, a phantom-like Bret Hart appears
and hits the best-timed elbow in history and draws the
heartbreaking disqualification. I always imagined this
was how he woke up Owen for school every day. Hey, it's
no wonder he eventually turned on him.
Honky, Bret & Jim Neidhart then
do a number on Savage in the interim, and with the Harts
holding Savage in position, Honky raises his guitar and
measures Macho for the head shot.Elizabeth however steps in
the way, and in a move that was looked at as taboo at the
time, Honky violently shoved her to the mat and proceeded to
crown Macho with the guitar. (In today's WWE, Honky would have
hit Liz with the guitar, then the Hart's would put her through
the table, all while Lawler talked about the possibility of
one of her titties flying out of her dress while secretly
masturbating under his desk.).
Liz
then runs back to the dressing room in a shtick that would
become commonplace in the months to come, dragging out the
Hulkster who had just had a "grueling" Title match with the
*undefeated* Sika (who was about as “undefeated” as Barry
Horrowitz at this point). Hogan fought off the heels, and when
it looked like Savage and Hogan would also come to blows, they
instead opted to shake hands, teasing it in slow motion before
finally sealing the deal. Yes, slow motion. Huh. Maybe
John Woo booked this match?
Winner by DQ: Randy Savage. The
Mega-Powers are formed, and Vince creams his powdered
blue suit-pants in anticipation of "the Madness" meeting "the
Mania". Seriously, anymore enthusiastically homoerotic,
and Vince would have given Jesse a reach around.


/5
Randy Savage Vs. Honky Tonk Man:
(12/26/87);
They
follow up with MSG network coverage of Savage and Honky in a
rematch that sees Jimmy Hart suspended in a cage and Peggy
"Sherri Martel" Sue is in Honky's corner as a result. Not
nearly as good as their first SNME offering, and an extremely
quick match as well. Savage is dominating when the ref gets
bumped and HTM uses the belt to knock Savage to the floor.
Just as the Referee is about to count out Savage, he calls for
the bell remembering Honky's use of the IC belt and suddenly
disqualifying Honky Tonk Man. Bleh. Very weak finish here,
and unless the referee has the same condition as the
fucking dude in Memento, it’s one that made little sense.
"Where am I? Am I chasing these wrestlers, or are they chasing
me? What's this picture in my pocket? 'Jimmy Hart--Don't
Believe His Lies.' Strange."
Side note: This is where the
HTM feud ends on this tape, and I'm surprised they didn't show
the February Main Event "final title shot" for Savage that has
so much historical significance, but hey, it is WWE, remember?
Continuity has never been their strongest suit. Hell, this is
the same company that put Jimmy Snuka and Roddy Piper on the
SAME TEAM at Survivor Series ‘89 despite the fact that Snuka
wanted to kill Piper for years. Although, in Snuka's
defense, Piper’s skirt and longish hair did make him look
kind of like a woman. I could see how he could make that
mistake. And call Vince to come over with a shovel and a
burlap sack.
Winner: Randy
Savage by DQ.
Randy Savage Vs. Ted DiBiase:
(03/07/88);
This was the tester for the WWF Title tournament
final that appeared on the March SNME broadcast that also saw
Hulk Hogan's surprisingly hardcore performance against Harley
Race that eventually lead to the end the Handsome one's
wrestling career. (When was the last time you heard that Hogan
worked too snug?). Anyway, the story here is to get across the
fact that with Andre The Giant in his corner, DiBiase would be
unstoppable and easily win the tournament. This one is
significantly cut and Savage gets manhandled by The Giant
causing a count-out win for Teddy boy.
After the match, there’s the inevitable Heel
beatdown, as Elizabeth does her running
away and retrieving The Hulkster routine, and said handshake
of earth-shattering importantness occurs again. The Madness meets the Ma…err, you get
the point.
In a side note: To let you know
how truly clueless I was as a fan at the time, I didn't see
the handwriting on the wall with all this Savage and
Hogan business, and actually insisted to my friends that
if Hogan didn't win the tourney, that Bam Bam Bigelow surely
would. Of course, I wore neon jammers and acid wash pants too
at the time and thought I was pretty fucking stylin’, so
my judgment may not have been the most reputable. But if you
needed a dude whose ensemble glowed in the dark, I was
definitely your man.



/5
The tournament actually rolls
around and they review Savage's four victories that actually
set the record for longest in-ring time in a single
Wrestlemania PPV at that point. A record eventually eclipsed
by unmatched athlete and known ironman, Viscera. Or not.
It was really HBK and Bret, but hey, fuck you for doubting
Vis.
Randy Savage Vs.
“The Natural” Butch Reed: (03/27/88);
Now,
knowing the political horse-shit that was going on with Reed
at the time, I'm surprised he actually showed up to put over
Savage here when he didn't even bother to show up when he was
going to get the IC belt the previous summer. And for the
record, Butch was called "The Natural" because he had "blond"
hair. Which I understand is a real rarity for black men apparently. Who
knew. What's next, fucking Riki Ataki gets an Irish
gimmick?
Anyway, Savage does his usual
human punching bag routine prevalent throughout his stints as
a Face. Butch goes up presumably for his flying clothesline
tackle finish, but he's jawing with Liz and moseying a little
too slow and Savage throws him off Flair-style and hits the
elbow to send Butch and his "natural" head of hair down south
to Atlanta, where I'm pretty sure the
inappropriate conversation he just had with a
Southern white woman and said hair color just
might get him lynched. No wonder he wore a mask for 2
years! Ahem.

/5
Randy Savage Vs. Greg Valentine (03/27/88);
The
surprising thing here is that they just didn't pull the
trigger on Savage/Steamboat 2, instead of putting Valentine
over the Dragon. Especially since The Hammer had been used as
fodder in the new Dream Team in the previous months leading to
the show and didn’t exactly have very much in the way of
momentum going into this thing. And speaking of
which, who'd ever think the team of Valentine and
DINO BRAVO was a dream, anyway? What a masochist that booker
was. A dream? Come on. Maybe like that one where you go
to school without pants. Anyway, a Savage victory
over Steamboat would erase that one black mark on his record,
and considering they were putting all their eggs in Macho's
ridiculously tie-died basket, I'm surprised they didn't.
...Or am I? The WWF still had this
whole philosophy that if we saw two "good guys" fight our
collective heads would explode. "Can. Not. Choose. Too . Much.
Goodness!" BOOOOOOM.
Anyway, this is also J.I.P. and
we see Hammer working Savage's leg to put over that Randy
would be a physical mess going into the next matches. Finally,
Valentine tries to apply the figure four but Savage steals
page 132 of the Flair playbook (skipping the chapter where he
pulls an inebriated Arn Anderson's head out of the
commode) and secures the inside cradle for the win. Or
SMALL PACKAGE as it was known in the WWF. Don't ever
accept a Christmas gift from Vince if it's in a tiny box, lest
you be prepared to be rolled into an uncomfortably small ball!
Or something.


/5
Randy Savage Vs. One
Man Gang (03/27/88);
If he was a One Man Gang, then why did he need
Slick? Isn't that like calling your team the Lone Rangers?
Anyway, this was several months before Gang would
"re-discover" his "African" roots, and become one of the worst
(albeit perversely funny) characters in modern wrestling
history: Akeem The African Dream, going from morbidly obese
white guy… to morbidly obese white guy who thinks he’s black.
Actually, I see people like this
all the time at the mall….
Anyway, Savage basically avoids
Gang's bulk, and they do a cheesy DQ spot where OMG tries in
vain to shish kabob Macho Man with Slick's "pimpin' cane, but
the referee sees it and gives the duke to Macho advancing him
to the final round. My heart goes out to Gang, though. He was
THIS close. I guess it's back to the gang clubhouse where you
sit all by yourself? Holy shit. That's why he never
bothered to learn any of those cool gang signs, because
he's the only fucking member.He clearly never thought
this whole One Man Gang thing through...
/5
Randy Savage Vs. Ted DiBiase
(03/27/88);
This
was the tournament final, and as far as main event’s go, this
was probably Wrestlemania’s best one up to this point.
(Although with an immobile Andre and Mr. T getting the top
spots previously, it's no wonder why). The story here is that
with Andre in DiBiase's corner, and after eliminating Hogan in
the Quarter finals on DiBiase's behalf, it looked like smooth
sailing for The Million Dollar
Man.
Literally. He has a yacht and that's what rich people do. Or
something. Anyway,
of course
Elizabeth
on cue gets the Hulkster who apparently never seems to be
watching the monitor backstage and always looks baffled and
confused as to why he's being dragged out by
Elizabeth
. You'd think after
the seventh or eighth time he'd figure out that maybe Savage
was in trouble. Of course this is the SAME moron who got
betrayed by Paul Orndorff TWICE and never saw it coming, so
umm, ya.
Anyway, Savage looks to finish with the flying
elbow but DiBiase rolls clear and breaks out The Million
Dollar Dream for the first time (he had been using a crazy
blind reverse elbow off the 2nd buckle prior). Andre then gets
the ref's attention so Hulk slides in and pole-axe's
DiBiase with a chair allowing Savage to recover and hit an
impossibly far flying elbow to win the Undisputed (as it's
announced) WWF Title. HEY! I thought Jericho was the first
undisputed Champion! It’s almost as if they just said that in
2001 to sell a pay-per-view or something….
After the win, Hogan of course
stays behind and passes the torch to Macho, and by "pass the
torch" I mean soak up Randy's moment so people won't forget
who it was really all about,Bruther.



/5
Randy Savage Vs. One Man Gang:
(04/22/88);
This was billed as Savage's first
title defense and it takes place on the April SNME broadcast.
OMG of course dominates the onset until a miscue by Slick and
the cane meant for Savage allows Randy to hit the flying elbow
and score the pin. This was the end of Gang in that
incarnation as a few weeks later he put on the giant
Easter Egg and became Akeem. There was even a big
tribal ceremony and everything with African Bushmen
dancing and chanting...in an alley in
Chicago. Yes. I'd say that's a little bit of a deter from
the fucking Serengeti. This was about as awkward as Gang
having to initiate himself into his own Gang. You
know, because he's one man, and umm, never mind.

/5
Randy Savage
Vs. Ted DiBiase: (05/27/88);
Randy and Ted climb back on that
horse, this time at MSG where they proceed to put on a clinic.
Randy treats the gonorrhea and Ted tests someone for
Chlamydia. They're quite the medical duo. Or maybe they
just had a good match. Whatever.
Anyway, it's sad to see how
they dropped the ball with DiBiase in his prime. And not just
the one he kicked out of the hands of a diminutive black
child. Savage collides with DiBiase at one point opening
up Ted's nose hard-way. They come up with a creative spot that
sees them simultaneously ram each other's heads into the
exposed turnbuckle. Savage lands on DiBiase and looks to
collect the win when Virgil intervenes and causes the
disqualification. Oh that Virgil. He's good for more than
shirtlessly cleaning up Ted's winter residence in the
Netherlands Antilles. Why hasn't anyone ever looked into that,
by the way? Every time I've ever demanded my cleaning woman
dust shirtless, I get a sexual harassment lawsuit. Am I doing
it wrong?


/5
Randy Savage Vs. Virgil:
(05/10/88);
Funny
story with Virgil. He had just come off a run in the AWA as
Soultrain Jones when brought in to be DiBiase's "bodyguard".
The company actually named him "Virgil" as a rib to Dusty
Rhodes whose real name is Virgil Runnels. The other funny
thing about Virgil is that in
reality, he would be the worst bodyguard in history, as
he got his ass kicked just about every night.
Even funnier is that he also *allegedly* got his
WWF job when he unfurled his cock on Pat Patterson's
desk, if you believe certain urban legends. Funny, that never
ever seemed to work whenever I applied for a job.
Maybe because it was a Rape Crisis hotline call center. Maybe.
Anyway,
Virgil was not so far removed from full time wrestling here
and put on a credible match with Macho Man on an episode of
WWF Superstars. A show that by way of the usual line-up,
probably should have been called "WWF Superstars...along with
a lot of fat shaggy white people that have like no chance".
Anyway, DiBiase is in Virgil's corner in this "non-title"
match (Back in these days the company still adhered to
somewhat of a realistic contender system) and subsequently
interfered at every turn. It has to be noted here that Jesse
Ventura while on color, never turned against Randy Savage even
though Macho was now a “face” and
Ventura
was a "heel
sympathizer". Jesse instead opted to chastise
Elizabeth
as being useless as
a manager, which is kind of true considering she never got
physically involved like say a Sherri Martel did. Anyway,
after an early Virgil flurry, Savage regains the momentum and
drops Virgil throat first across the top rope and squashes him
with a flying elbow to pick up the win. We should all dispose
of our butlers this way.
Anyway, it would be about 6
years until Virgil actually got a win in the WWF.
Coincidentally enough against his own employer Ted DiBiase.
They spun some storyline that Virgil all those years just
"took the abuse" because he was "feeding his family": But once
the motherfucker won that Million Dollar belt, he didn't trade
it in for food stamps or some shit, and just wore it
around until he lost it. Clearly, Virgil was as terrible a
provider as he was a bodyguard.
After the match, Savage and
DiBiase would try to brawl but be broke up by a seemingly
unending crop of Z-list TV Wrestlers. Which was funny, because
how often do you get to see guys like Mike Sharpe and Brian
Costello bumping elbows with the World Champion? This reminds
me of the time fucking Horshu (Luther Reigns) slithered
into the ring and somehow celebrated with Sting at
Starrcade '97. Hilarious. Although, my theory has always been
that they allowed him to be there just in case the crowd
rioted. After all, what's left that can be done to
that guy?


/5
Randy Savage Vs. Ted DiBiase:(06/25/88)
Yet another return-match back in a time when house
shows actually mattered and you'd only see your big blow offs
there. This was a steel cage match, when the company was still
using the giant blue cages that looked like shit you'd see in
a children's playground. A Playground which I'm assuming
sometime leased its umm, "equipment" to The Devil,
who now owns all the steel cages. Well, if Jim Ross is to
be believed.
The reason they used these big
blue cages? Well, for one it was much easier for the crowds
and in turn TV to see the action, and 2nd … so The Hulkster could actually
climb over. The clumsy orange fuck. The end came when
both Savage and DiBiase were climbing the cage simultaneously
jockeying for position. Virgil climbed up from the outside in
an attempt to help pull his employer to victory. An
overzealous fan (and I'm being generous here) climbed up as
well and began peppering Virgil with forearms to the back
until security pulled him off. To Virgil's credit he kept his
cool not breaking his concentration on the match's finish,
only attempting one mule kick that had it connected, it would
have likely killed the kid. Awesome. He washes your clothes,
presses your suits, and murders errant children. What more
could you ask for in an
employee.
Savage continues
to fight off both Ted and Virgil as the three stood
suspended on the side of the cage. Randy then managed to
conk both their heads together Three Stooges style
(seriously), made DiBiase follow the direction of his hand,
poked him in the eyes, ripped out a clump of his hair
(not so seriously) and then climbed to the floor to
retain the WWF cough*undisputed*cough title. Nyuk, Nyuk Nyuk.


/5
Randy Savage
Vs. Ted DiBiase: (07/30/04)
You can almost hear Savage saying
"This guy again?". Only you know, it'd sound more
like "thinkin' thinkin thinkin' that the Macho Man, the man
that slithered with the snakes and soared with the eagles, and
been everywhere in between, is on top of the mountain, yeah,
the mountain, yeah, the mountain, the top, the tippity
top, too sweet to be stopped, and the peak is crawling
with madness! The Madness is outta control, ohh yeah, and it's
unstoppable and can't be stopped and won't be stopped and
can't be, no it can't, and it can't and it won't, no it won't,
yeah, and uhh, yeah, I'm the champion of champions and a
champion of champions, your champion, everyone's
champion, and yeah, Ted DiBiase, yeah. Dig it." And
sadly, that's almost a fucking shoot.
This was from the Wrestle Fest
show from Milwaukee's county stadium that featured Hogan and
Andre in a Steel cage, in addition to the infamous "weasel
suit" match between Ultimate Warrior and Bobby Heenan (not to
be confused with the brutal weasel suit matches between George
Hackenshmidt and Frank Gotch in the early turn of the
century...). This one as I remember was actually axed off the
video release so not to steal the thunder from the EPIC
COLLISION that was Hogan and Andre in a Cage that moved
at such a tedious pace, you can actually see people
disintegrating in the background from advanced age.
Savage and DiBiase continue their
streak of good matches here and DiBiase of course controls the
majority of the match until Savage is seemingly beaten but
manages to pull off a quick small package to retain the title
as the crowd explodes. Literally. Verne Gagne had
Da Crusher plant a bomb in the crowd for daring
to run Milwaukee. Or not.



/5
At this
point, we get our Summer Slam’88 build, as Savage needs a tag
team partner to face DiBiase & Andre. BUT WHO WILL IT
BE??? Hacksaw Jim Duggan? If you
just said "Holy shit, Sean, as if!" Apparently you were a
smarter 11 year old boy than I was.
And yes, in my 1988 markness, I
actually thought it would be HACKSAW JIM DUGGAN. I am so not
kidding. But to the surprise of no one (except me) it was Hulk
Hogan, fresh off the set of No Holds Barred, where he went
tęte-ŕ-huge-ridiculous-bald-tęte with ZEUS. A man so dedicated
to his "craft" that he spent the time he should have
been learning to fucking wrestle, getting a really
cool custom "Z" shaved in his head. And you know what? That's
what Vince's original plan for Wrestlemania 6 was. Seriously.
Hogan vs. Zeus. I 'm not knocking Zeus or anything, but
in-ring wise, he made El Gigante look like Ed Strangler Lewis.
The motherfucker had three holds. A double standing
forearm to the traps, a bearhug, and blinking a lot. So, ya,
smart move going with Warrior instead. Even though he knows
only 2 more moves...
The Mega-Powers Vs. The Mega-Bucks:
(08/29/88);
The
Mega-Bucks were of course Ted DiBiase & Andre The Giant,
who like star-crossed lovers had found their way back into
each other's arms after being separated since Wrestlemania.
Maybe that was the real reason Ted wore a suit that tore
completely from his body in 2 seconds. I don't know.
Anyway, the name "Mega-Bucks" was obviously a play
on Mega Powers, but I'm guessing
that Ted was the only one bringin' any bucks to this
tandem. After all, a rich man doesn't wear
the same huge pit-stained hound's-tooth jacket
for 20 years straight...
This match is also famous for two other reasons,
one being that it's the point where any Randy Savage
originality was lost as they began dressing Savage in Hulk's
colors, all but tipping their hat (dew rag?) to the
audience that Randy was a lame-duck champion and that Hogan
was the real "star"; and two being: Getting as close to T
& A as you were going to get in 1988 from Elizabeth when she removed
her skirt, revealing a bikini bottom. People wouldn’t even bat
an eye today over this, but at the time, it was probably
pretty safe to say you could repopulate the earth with
the amount of “DNA” donated to this Summer Slam
“moment.”
Jesse Ventura also served as
Referee, as they teased his being bought off by Ted DiBiase
going in. I'm guessing Humphrey is kicking himself that he
didn't use this footage during
that 1998 Governor's race. "He takes bribes
from pantsless Millionaires who abuse their negro
houseboys!" Come on. It's a sex/ financial/race scandal
all rolled up into one! I should so be a political adviser.
Anyway, Hogan and Savage of
course go over after said Liz skirt-dropping, with a
combination Flying elbow/Big Leg and a Hulk cover of DiBiase
while Savage physically forced
Ventura
to count “3”. The
most intriguing thing of this match though was the post
match celebration of Hogan, Liz and Savage that saw Hogan give
a big Hulkster-sized hug to Liz and subtly apply his big
orange catcher's mitt to her ass whilst she was in the
Savage shoulder position. Savage all but says "What the
fuck are you doing?". Only it'd sound more like "Yeah, I'm
seein' and I'm thinkin' and I'm knowin' and thinkin' and
knowin,' and knowin' and thinkin' that, yeah, you must have
eyes for Elizabeth! The Madness! The Madness
is here! Madness there! Madness everywhere, but you Hulk.
But you. Not so much you, because, yeah, I look
into the eyes, and mine, and yours, and hers, uh,
yeah, and I see a shark, a shark with teeth, a shark with
lust and lust, and lust for Elizabeth and yeah, I'm thinkin'
that you know that I know, that you know that they know,
that we all know that the Hulkster, yeah, Dig
it."
Exactly.


/5
FINAL
THOUGHTS: The video was quite good as Savage was
probably the best all around wrestler in the company at the
time. Even if his promos made as much sense as trying to
decipher the Dead Sea Scrolls after ingesting a sack of
Mushrooms. My only complaint though is that it
actually only encompassed about half of Savage's one year
reign, as from here he went on to feud with the likes of
Dino Bravo and Bad News Brown (who interestingly enough was
also promised the WWF belt) before of course going psycho and
accusing Hulk Hogan of having eyes for Elizabeth (not to be
confused with the REAL LIFE Randy Savage). If only they had
just waited about 6 months more, and captured the AWESOME
build to WrestleMania 5 with Hulk Hogan, it could have beenthat
much better. Yeah, dig it. And I
did.
Thumbs up.
I’m Sean.
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Carless
Sean Carless
is a man of many hats. And he wears those hats to cover an
ever-increasing bald spot. Sean's various scribblings have
been read at Live AudioWrestling, 411 Mania, Honky Tonk
Man.com, The Toronto Star.com, Wrestlecrap, and Lethal
Wrestling. He has also cured
AIDS.